I hear it all the time … "You're boyfriend is so great!"
"Um … well, he's not technically my boyfriend," is my practiced response to which I always receive looks of surprise and wonder. My best friend said (in her sarcastic way) … "Really? Well, someone should tell you guys because you sure act like boyfriend/girlfriend."
She made me think … what does it actually mean … boyfriend? It's meant different things throughout my life in different situations. The literal definition of boyfriend is a frequent or regular male companion in a romantic or sexual relationship.
OK … we've got that. So he can be considered my "boyfriend" … can't he? If it looks like a duck and sounds like a duck … it's a damn duck! He is my boyfriend.
Or is that definition lacking something? Can you be considered boyfriend/girlfriend with out an expressed level of commitment and exclusivity?
No … I guess you really can't. So he's not my boyfriend.
Can that commitment be implied by action? I'm not sure. What does it all mean? Our relationship is beyond casual dating but we are not committed and exclusive. Love? I don't know. Fear is a powerful thing. We've been together for close to two years with no forward progress towards a future. Yet we speak every day. He's become a very important part of my life. And I'm an important part of his.
But the point of this blog was to define what a boyfriend is. So tell me … what does boyfriend mean to you?
I'll be waiting …
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Yeah, I think if you're not exclusive then he's not your "boyfriend." I hate that word anyway, once you turn 25 or so. There really ought to be a better word. And not "significant other," either. That's just dumb.
ReplyDeleteThis is actually more than a year old. I edited and updated and posted. I still have that writers block or whatever it is going on in my noggin. I think it's because all I've been doing lately is reading the Twilight series.
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